So, what's the plan?

You know those days when every single conversation seems to be super meaningful? Almost like you're in a really long therapy session, but it is exactly what you need?....   

Today was like that. 

I started teaching again today. And in true Chilean fashion, only one student showed up to my 3 student class. My student was exceptionally thoughtful and intelligent (I seem to have the best of luck with getting awesome students). We spent almost the entire class discussing relationships, marriage, divorce, and deterioration of the family unit... Kind of depressing topics I guess, but the conversation was so insightful. It really got me thinking about how I want my relationship to work out, what I want in terms of a family in the future, and how to achieve all of that. My student and I basically came to the conclusion that a solid family is not just caring and supporting your children, but also nuturing the relationship you have with your spouse. My student said she felt like too many people neglect the relationship aspect of marriage after they have children (or get so wrapped up in work and making money to support themselves). Everyone needs that love and support of their SO. And having that gives a beautiful example for children of a loving relationship. Makes for happy people all around. 

Later this afternoon I met up for lunch with a friend. This lunch pretty much turned into a private motivational seminar for Miss Kelly (aka me). My friend convinced me that everyone needs a plan... whether it's about where to go to lunch or what job you want to obtain by the following year or where you want to be living in 10 years. You always have to heading somewhere.  

OK, timeout. You have to understand that I am not a planner. I was never that person who graduated from high school and had my course of study, career, deadline for marriage and children, etc all decided on. I definitely knew people like that ...  maybe not all of them had those plans set in stone, but most definitely had things at least penciled in. I am a fickle person... constantly changing my mind and changing my path...  What I DO know though is that my "goal" in life is to be happy wherever I am living, whatever I am doing, whomever I am with...  (this seems to be working for me so far... but I often feel as if im just floating along, letting life's waves take me where they please). 

Alright, so I explained just this thing to my friend, and he said to me... "So you're goal in life is to be happy. Good. Now, how are you going to achieve that?"  Seems like a silly question, right? But he went on: "What makes you happy changes, obviously... so you have to make plans for new ways to be happy...  So you STILL have to plan."  So I have to ask myself, What makes me happy?  After answering that, I can really go after those things that will achieve that ... and be happy about it. Really happy. not just with this sense of contentment that I have at the moment. 

Ok, I am doing a really craptastic job at explaining what my friend said to me (cut me some slack though.. this was my first day back working and i woke up at 6:30am for the first time since December). 

Basically this is what I know... I came back to Chile because I knew it would make me happy. I jumped right back into teaching because I knew it would make me happy. I went to the beach this past weekend because I knew it would make me happy. (you get the idea). I planned all these things, but without feeling like I was planning them. They all just felt like natural things to do. So imagine if I actually made real plans about things (that I know will make me happy... blah blah blah... this is getting annoying now. haha)....  I don't think I ever considered how happy I can be. I guess I just settled on happily content. 

This all might seem obvious, I suppose. But just think for second....  Why do you make the plans that you make? What is your ultimate goal? Is there anything else you could be doing to get there? 

And a question for you "planner" types: are your plans really for you? or are they just plans to reach the standards of everybody else?  (I ask this question because this is the very reason I am so anti-planning...  I want to live for me, not because society, my culture or even my family or friends thinks I should be doing certain things). 

Sorry this is so stupidly long, confusingly put together, and generally horribly written. Hope it makes some bit of sense though.